San Antonio Puffy Tacos / Cult of Fluff

In my other life, I am a Realtor. The amount of annoying things Realtors do to get attention or clients is insane. To be fair you should know that a lot of these brokerages are like little cults. I am not kidding. They even have their own chants and there is usually a creepy guy running the meetings. Instead of robes, he’s wearing a jazzy business suit and quirky socks.  He is always telling you that you're a “family”. You will see their agents posting about how they love their “(insert biz name) Family”.

  • First, I don’t need any more family, and a few members of the one I have I would gladly give back.
  • Second, What in hell does that I have to do with selling Real Estate? Isn’t there an age old saying “Don’t mix family and business”?
  • Third, if you were my family they would be calling you out on the B.S. that is constantly streaming out of your mouth. My Dad would put up with all y’all's fluffy puffy talk for exactly 5 seconds. 

As per the cultish business model, they train their agents to be “Daring” (I have changed the word as to protect myself from Realtor Rath) and use all these marketing techniques to get those clients in the door. Just remember your “Family” will gladly stab you in the back and steal that client. Hmm, maybe they are like some of my family. Everything needs to be done for that mighty dollar bill. Cold calls, mailers, door knocking, and the new favorite Facebook videos.

Facebook videos - I know its the cool, new tool to promote yourself and be successful in your business but why is it not about Real Estate? Show me houses or tips for selling or buying a house!. Why is it just you in your car (oh why the car) talking about how great you are? How about this, how about you stop using your phone as a tool to record your self-adoration and I don’t know... answer the damn phone? Or the videos where they are showing you everything but Real Estate. Thanks for letting me know how to make the ultra-technical Tuna Casserole but I’d prefer you show me kitchens in which to make my own damn casserole. 

You will not see me doing these videos, I just can’t. Luckily my clients usually choose me because I’m irreverent and don’t follow any of these marketing techniques. I run my business completely opposite. I think to myself “Would this aggravate me?” If the answer is "Yes!!!” then I don’t do it. I am sure that means I have lost clients that other Realtors have harassed and stalked. The other side of that is I get the best clients a girl could ask for - my people. The people that scroll past those videos and make a mental note to never use that guy that called and spammed him even after they asked them to stop. Those are my people! I may not be the slick salesmen but I am a hoot to go see houses with. And I get the job done, even though I don’t record it, it still happens. 

I am sure this is just another episode in my series My steps to becoming a "Crabby Old Lady” but hey, I have embraced my inner Grumpy Old Lady.

Since you will hear no fluffy, puffy talk from me - I brought you a fluffy, puffy taco. 

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